heartbeat...

Rethinking the last few years, I reminded myself of how blessed I am to have the most beautiful favors of Allah and His Beloved Sallallahu Alaihe Wasallam upon me. I reflected on circumstances of the past and much recent present. When some thing good is underway, Shaytaan derives pessimism and frustration from our own insecurities... And if we reflect and keep our hearts afloat in faith.. Those things that seem impossible pave way to move mountains. Time to gear up, time to take that breath and well.. Leap. One will either end up with wings, be carried to harbor or.. Fall to a bed of flutters and flowers.. Never to dark and dense evils or sorrows. Alhamdulillah to everything I have today... Alhamdulillah to every reason I may have to glow... And people wonder why I am fascinated by Fireflies...


These were my thoughts, my musings for the last two days or so. I've been just frying my mind, body and soul towards producing work for my thesis. I'm really slow paced, because it takes me REALLY long to get my sketches out and even longer to just resolve it all. I'm just on that tick tick moment in time. I'm very tense, super nervous... but at the same VERY optimistic. 


Mission Graduation means a LOT to me. More emotionally than proudly speaking...
My Papa has invested so much of his efforts and time in putting me through such a strong institution for education. My Mama and Baba have put in just as much if not more in helping me cope with everything from my monthly haul of art supplies to the late night 'I can't do this' tantrums... or the jitters and bugs along with the frozen leg and deep heat spray moments on jury mornings! I can't forget my aunt and uncle's endless pep talks, or even Api's for that matter. I can't even begin to not remember those times Nivy kept me from going crazy abot my work... I can't remind myself enough of Z's support... he's the biggest source of encouragement.. and WHAT worries me beyond words is possibly disappointing or giving my little Hayaati any sign of negativity about studying in an art school, or venturing to be a 'Textile Designer'... she's very confidently told her teachers she wants to be one when she gets older, just like her api. It makes me melt when she says things like, Api drawing ker rahi ho? Aunty ko acha laga? C-ster! You can do this, you can keep at it, thora thora kerke Aunty Khush hoyengi jayengi. Aap kerte raho. That's motivation for me.


Graduating is a VERY big thing. When growing up, my dad never attended my 6th grade 'graduation'... he never attended the 8th grade one either. When I made it out of A- levels, that too wasn't a big deal. Because his definition of accomplishment and achievement.. AND graduation.. was that thing you call a degree after 4 years of intense hard work. Alhamdulillah, he's ever proud of me for my Firefly.. but now it's like I just owe him and my mum so much by just possibly walking the stage in that gown with that dopey cap... 


MashaAllah, Dissertation Viva went well. I couldn't really figure out if it was constructive criticism or that my topic really stirred questions. I didn't get bashed for punctuation errors... and it was conversational all in all. Felt positive after my 12 minutes of sitting in the Board Room. Alhamdulillah!


Now for thesis, I took on linear floral.. in contemporary design... to accompany my flowers, I chose geometric elements as well as stripes and grids... We don't really see that in dupattas. We're always on the hunt for that 'somethin'. Well, that hunt is damn crazy when you yourself are in the designer's shoes... I have a lot to do... but I'm at it. Slow but steady? Is it safe to say so?


I'm a 'chooza'.. you know a little chick when it comes to things with colossal weightage.. like that degree thing... or the 'G' word... The first para of this post, those opportunities... those reflections.. I've literally  gone back and analyzed my 4 years at the valley, the people I've met, the experiences I've encountered, everything. It just adds to what I feel or how I think now. If anything, it brought me closer to my family, it gave me more faith in Allah and His Master Plans. You lose some, to win some... and when you win some... You realize the true value of that 'something'. Alhamdulillah! 


Oh! For everyone who reads this and wants to know what's up with the orders? I realized after a good talk with my parents that it was necessary I put Firefly on hold. *gasp* I know. I really really need to get through this inshaAllah to be able to get through more and accomplish more later on. :) So apologies to all those disappointed, JazakAllah to everyone sitting patiently, and love to all those who keep me in their duas and do let me know they're waiting or miss me. :) <3


To all those who have gone abroad for the Holy Pilgrimage, may Allah Almighty accept your beautiful ibadah and give all others that opportunity to cleanse their souls and fulfill this arkaan of our deen. 


Thank you Allah mian for EVERY blessing... please write me a good recommendation letter Allah Kareem, for the sake of Your Beloved, Sallallahu Alaihe Wasallam. I really REALLY need one at the end of the month...


Oh and Allah Mian, thank you for giving me my Mama... because... :)

iWonder

So, the last two days, every newsfeed, status update, wall photo, and e-article covers the latest tragedy, death of Steve Jobs, co founder and CEO of Apple.

Mr Jobs, has been accredited as a visionary who impacted lives through innovations he created, that took the world by storm. He changed the world... Reminds me of the time Michael Jackson, the Prince of Pop departed...

Think and pause for a second... we have had the Quran and Sunnah for over 1400 years... unchanged. Same values, same benefits. Why aren't we appreciating that? :/ No disrespect to the departed soul, but seriously. Makes me wonder.

Every form of corruption, every form of grief, sorrow, hardship and is taken as a mis-judgment (Naoozubillah) or lack of hearing/answering our prayers. It is not taken with the idea that the Almighty gave us blessings in abundance, we just never sat and thanked Him for a minute... instead we rounded ourselves up into waiting since 4 am outside an AT&T outlet to purchase the new iPhone, when waking up for Fajr is just so dang difficult... -_-;

Allah Kareem just likes listening to us cry out to Him, loves hearing us call out to Him, speaks proudly to the angels when He is Praised, as He rewards His servants. It is never that this was 'wrong' or it 'shouldn't' have happened... the blast last month itself was an example. People say too bad, a young child lost his life. Lost his dreams.. lost his tomorrow... We don't realize he actually went to a much better place than you or me. He left this world in innocence, when a sin wasn't known to him, when evils were far from his sight... Allah Kareem has the Master Plan... and He writes it the Best way we can never think or imagine possible.

And for everyone saying Rest in Peace, and all the Heavenly wishes... Mr Jobs was a Buddhist.. A Muslim is to pray for his hidayat and forgiveness while he is alive, for a chance he may revert to the true path to Islam... after the soul has departed.. there  isn't a prayer we can keep for him. Allah Kareem knows best.

I never owned an iPhone, or iPod, or MacBook... I know people that have.. I know those who are affected and upset... and well... Everything's pre-written. Yes?

PS: This isn't meant to offend anyone or disrespect anyone's view, it is intended to provoke thought, to re-contemplate our own faith, our own heroes.. and OUR final destination, not the the technological revolution's.

shivers and shudder...

Well, sitting against the headboard last 2 nights and then today as well has been... slightly uncomfortable. The passing by of every tanker and trailer makes me feel like the ground is moving... an earthquake perhaps.. or maybe that's my little escape evading the thought of another blast somewhere.

My Monday morning was a jumpstart quite literally waking up on the wrong side of the bed to a sound horrifying. It felt like my windows would cave in. Everything was just moving.. shaking. I stormed out of my room.. and well. Within minutes we know what had happened. Taqdeer is written in so many ways... and life and death are ordained on the same patter. We feel sorrow, we feel the hurt... but we must awaken ourselves to accept that what God wills, shall and will always be!

With life's little chapters, I am grateful that I have one of the greatest sources of optimism and inspiration... Firefly. I never expected it to be where it is now. Alhamdulillah to the success I hold now... it is all because of Him. :)

I think it's kinda cute how several young people out there believe I'm not only an Indus Grad, but now teach there. Haha. Kiddos I'm in my final semester! Some ways to go! :) Prayers please? Time is flying by so quickly... and that farewell is nearing. The only thing constant in life is change. But how much change can we consider ourselves content with?

Believing in the Master plan.. I'm just taking each day as it happens I suppose. Alhamdulillah to all the little magical moments I've witnessed in recent weeks with my little sister. Who would prefer to be me if not my clone. She's four. And wants what I want. Wants to be what I want to be. And wants a visiting card as yellow as mine!

While we are talking about yellow and some happy thoughts.. I'm considering the scrapper session! Plans got delayed with the situation with the rains.. then the city.. and then.. well you get the idea. How does a five hour crafter's retreat sound?! Learn some techniques, get the hang of layouts, take a look at some really neat tips and tricks and get your mind going. :D All those interested.. send me a one liner on gmail.. so I get a rough idea about the preparations and response. :)

An exhibition is due.. but at the moment, it's just thesis madness... and well.. madness is.. mandatory to excel or proceed further in life ;) hehe. Happy Madness everybody! Smile Sunshine.

PS: I'm half asleep.

we are what we are...

I personally don't watch a lot of television, frankly because I'm too lazy to go to my brother's room and flip through channels, AND because I hardly get time between going to uni, working on orders... and hanging out with my little sister. I love movies, and am fond of music. But it's not the essence of my soul, as in, I can go days without listening to a track and I can Alhamdulillah, have good pace of work with or without a jingle to hum to.

Given that I hardly flip channels and the only thing I do catch glimpses of are the headlines and breaking news developments I happen to come across when sitting with my parents...

And of course, now that we're in this digital realm, all our articles and news updates are available online... even opening Facebook, all you see are threads and series of status updates about how everyone is suffering and how everyone is upset and enraged about the terror in the city and the utter chaos our people are falling to.

Here is what I've observed. In the middle of a fast, when your mind is to control anger, frustration and remember the Exalted Creator, you are posting about the horror tearing across town with such foul words and dirty language. Hmm... whaddia know. This is how we have welcomed our last Ashura, this is how we react to the evil deeds of the misguided, by wasting our hasanat in reacting to their wrong doings in such a manner. Point. 1.

We feel helpless, we want to carry forward on our marches and stand up for our people. We want change. How is creating an event on Facebook going to do so, if all you're doing is clicking 'attending' and logging in from the comfort of your pajamas at 3 pm in the afternoon? Point 2.

Recent controversy, related to tv personalities and scholars. Does everyone honestly think it was worth spending time posting and ranting about someone or his actions? When the least we could have done is maybe did Tauba and sought for protection from being misled? Aren't these signs for us, of that DAY? Our country is in divide, where a Pakistani is thirsting the blood of another Pakistani. It is not for religion, it is not for land. I'm really wondering, what's the purpose? We were warned of such doings... were we not? Point 3.

Everyone is crying out and pleading to the All Forgiving, All Loving Super Power. He has never EVER left us stranded. We have food on our plates, the comfort of our air conditioned homes, cars running smoothly enough for us to commute all across town. But when calamity falls, why is it we turn to Him only then? When we as a people are doing our level best to keep Him and His Beloved along with the values of Islam far from our work place and institutions? Is it not true? You want to take leave for Umrah, you are told to decide whether you want to pursue your education or do ibadah... You want to observe a Holy Day such as Juma tul Widah, you are told, we cannot give a holiday for every occasion, when duely so, our institutions can close due to excess rain, because the city is on fire or someone in some God knows what post was shot and his funeral has taken place but his people want you to mourn for 3 days even though you have no clue what he did, who he was or what exactly we are mourning.

Tomorrow is Yaom e Hazrat Ali... the day of his Shahadah. How many offices are functioning? How many are observing the day in respect. I am not a Shia' Muslim. I'm a Sunni, but that doesn't matter. I strongly, strongly Alhamdulillah believe in love for my Holy Prophet Sallallahu Alaihe Wasallam and His family... And I respect the significance of the day. But I don't get it, I'm utterly confused, when it's okay for people to skip work and play cricket on the streets the day it's raining, when it's okay for students to miss school and hang out with friends or prance on their rooftops in the rain, why is it not okay to stay at home out of respect for such important days of our history? :/

I know this is very different from what I usually post about, but today I just felt I had to. I am a very optimistic person when it comes to the state of my country and the matters of it's people. That we will survive... and we will rise beautiful, strong and free... but I also feel our deeds and actions as a people, our mindset regarding our being in this world and are attitude towards our deen and our Creator all add up to the state we're in. We have strayed, and we need to accept it. Deen wants that which is easy for us. I love how Ramadan is that prep camp, it's supposed to energize us for the remaining year, but funnily enough our battery discharges as soon as Chaand Raat nears. Did you know that that is the night in which all the rewards for ibadah are distributed? How many of us reminded ourselves that we are fasting when someone provoked our anger? Did you? How many of us fought our Nafs when it came to picking faults in our colleague or co worker, Did you?

Life isn't a report card where you get to repeat a course because you flunked. It's fair and final. And you don't know when you'll sit for your exam, best be prepared for it at all times. It is saddening to know that Kaffans are being sold instead of new clothes for coming Eid. Could this beautiful month have more a message for us? Those of us that are safe and Alhamdulilah alive, should be more aware of our actions and deeds, should be more giving, be more kind hearted... and should be more welcoming to fate.

As the Holy Nights descend upon us, I request each person who has read this to say a sincere prayer for our people. Not just those who have lost their lives, but for ourselves, that Allah Kareem, make us strong in our faith, strengthen our Eman, and make our deeds of those who shall enter Paradise... and make this month of immense Blessing and Mercy a turning point for us all. Cleanse our hearts, and purify our souls. Make the storms hovering over rain finally, washing away all that which is dark and devious. 


PS, I just had smile shine upon my face... read the last paragraph, and heard thunder. :)
Smile Sunshine...

We have nothing to lose, as all that is ours belongs to Him. Our joys, our pride... our existence, our everything. I am not here preaching. :) I'm just here posting the ramblings I've had exhausted within my head in recent days.

I am very very grateful to Allah Kareem to have been able to accomplish a few things I tend to miss or delay every year. I hope everyone took a thing or two beneficial by visiting the Firefly page this Ramadan. I've received several beautiful emails this month and one of them was for Makkah Shareef! What a lucky soul...

Please forgive me for my shortcomings, and keep Firefly as well as the Firefly-Girl in your lovely duas.

Just Because, this made me smile.

Dear Varah Baji
[Firefly Girl;) ]


Oh well, i needed a case instead. Still thank you very much Varah Baji for your cooperation, though i know you are very busy these days. And for taking out your time :) I really appreciate it! =) And again I'd like to say that I just really loved your work!! it's just of my type, funky and fun! :D May GOD bless you and your work always! :) Surely in the future I'd love to order from you as your work is irresstible!;) But for now, I'd like to cancel my order as you don't have the correct thing of my need:) Still, I'D LOVE TO MEET YOU ONE DAY TOO! ^_^

Thank you! :)
Love,
Alisha.
PS: I'll phrase your words for you: Smile Sunshine! <3 :D


Ramadan Kareem everyone :) May this month bring all it's beautiful noor, to illuminate our hearts, and enrich our souls with the strongest Eman! Keep the Firefly Girl in your duas. And KESC too! :)

Congratulations to Tanya and Tamim, who have finally received their Save the Dates. I pray for the most beautiful life ahead for you two. May you always have each other and live the happily ever after everyone dreams of and learns from in fairytales. Ek tha Raja, Ek thi Rani...

A special wave to Komal Riz, who's the patientest woman EVER with her order. Luck has it that it gets delayed due to light flux OR errors in process. Sorry!

A hello to Amna Hanif, who's anxiously waiting for special tags that need to travel with her.

A big smile out to Amna Iqbal, who probably thought Firefly will drive her crazy with her keychains. It's so awesome, she waited and waited. WAITED and waited... and now she wants more of em. hehe. SubhanAllah!

I want to mention Fatima Hamdani, one of the many younger Firefly fans out there who write to me and write to the world. She blogs you know! Thanks for always adding those little sparkly bits of life in our randomest google chat convos kiddo. :)

Alina, who's working for a cause... This is her message for anyone and EVERYONE who reads it:
We as Ronaq-e-Qainaat are arranging a GRAND iftari THIS friday for over 300 to 400 people and children in collaboration with Payaam's trust....Please if ANYONE is interested in contributing for this noble cause.....contact me ASAP....!! Donate GENEROUSLY....!! CONTACT: rqainaat@gmail.com
*Do mention you saw this at the Firefly-Girl blog* :)


Sonya, dude... you just love the luggage tags. :) She and her family as well as friends abroad have ordered uncountable luggage tags, in fact, she's the reason I started making them. Lots of love your way. I  hope you recover really soon from your little ankle, foot.. chronic.. injury thing. :) x

Cookie baji, you've moved away and I have a feeling I'm going to miss out on those heartfelt cupcakes... Lots of duas for your new beginning at the other side of the world. Hope the tags travel with you always... <3


My ESP partner, C-ster. My little bro, Nivy. I miss you. I miss our packaging plant sitting in our pj's wrapping God knows how many star boxes stuffed with Skittles. I do know you're off to great things and inshaALLAH you will find all the success in the world, and baad mein too :) Love you!

I want to say thank you to my other half, Z.A. in HK... you've been such a great help and so so supportive from A to Z of everything I ever do. From the surprise package over the weekend, to the research you took on since I didn't have time, and for helping me put together the Ramadan series... bubba, thank you. :) You're Mr Awesome (MASHAALLAH!) and I can completely rely on you to upload stuff for me when my internet likes to be  meanie. :) JazakAllah!

Little Hayaati. My darling little mithi. Api loves you so so much. I will always be beside you, to teach you how to use the light table, to teach you how to hammer holes to make a notebook, to teach you how to use the cricut paper cutter, and of course, help you use glitter glue to color all your beautiful drawings for Z and me. In no time you'll have your own Skype ID. hehe. Billy, you are growing up so quickly and so soon, KG2! That's big now. MashaAllah. Can't wait til you're old enough to start Firefly orders with your Jaan.

The electricity may be unstable, there may be chances of error while processing, the samples I gave for metallic embellishments may have come out all wrong, people may have abandoned their orders... but Alhamdulillah... the forecast is whimsical, with a chance of rainbows!

Thank you everybody, we crossed 2500 today. :)

Lots of Love. Smile Sunshine.

The story of summer...

The last 2 months of my life and that of Firefly have been nothing less than extraordinary. I received the charming news of having a pending grade for my mini thesis. Which meant I do it again. My topic was irrelevant. I was upset, stressed, an utterly utterly shattered. Because I had put a lot into it.

I had to travel. As I am a resident abroad. That was a concern. I escaped for two weeks, mentally I was focused on all that needed to be done. A topic needed to be decided, prep work had to be conducted. It was madness! I had two internships to deal with. One which is still lingering. And then... there's Firefly.

For those who know the story of Firefly, they know it's from the pages of my journal... the real Firefly. I haven't written in it since March of last year, around the same time I started the whimsical forecast. It means heart and soul, and this summer has increased my passion for it.

It roots from emotions, which are no longer just mine, but those I share with friends and now the world. It's core is based on our sentiments and our life's experiences. I get asked so often, how do you find time. Trust me. The half an hour I work on Firefly is my break. It relaxes me to craft something. It sets me at ease to work with inspiration to doodle or create something whimsical and bright.

This summer has tested these emotions to an extent where I've tried pulling myself together stronger. One after another, external factors such as, electricity, violent conditions in the city, and random glitches during printing and color control have added to a splurge of orders that have a) been delayed, b) been mixed up, c) been uncollected.

There are several that turn to the page and write beautiful wordings and excited emails. And I keep having to say I shall respond soon. It's not because I haven't the interest. But it's because one after another, I'm STILL trying to resolve orders. Things have been super duper tough this summer because of the factors above.

I used to be able to deliver urgent orders within a day. Now they can't make it in 3. Normal processing time would be 3 days. Now it's 10 to 15 days... Because one job itself takes forever, and if there are any errors like last week's lot.. it goes for reprocessing.

So for every person who is slightly apprehensive or trying figure out what Firefly is upto, please know that it's very much aglow :) It is still trying to resolve matters and surface with all issues rectified inshaALLAH.

Firefly runs on prayers. And Alhamdulillah, I have several of them. I had the craziest week this week. I hadn't been sleeping. I would be in uni til midnight printing. I had a jury on Thursday. Midst all the craziness and stress, I've developed a sort of leg pain. And man, having it ten minutes before jury did not help! I smelled like deep heat spray. I would sit and smell that iodex smell while waiting :/ not to mention, the heat the medication creates. Felt like something was on fire!

Anyhow. You all would be pleased to know that with your sweet messages filled with prayers and good luck, I did well :) Alhamdulillah! I realized my own potential. The entire project was unsupervised. It felt great receiving constructive criticism on design. And it made me realize that my creative energy is mashaALLAH very much alive and kicking. :) I am so so lucky to have my parents and relatives stand by me and support me so thoroughly. They've been so patient of my tantrums and chaotic-stress-induced moods. Alhamdulillah! And Mr Awesome, goodness. He had been the most stressed along with me. But MashaALLAH, Zaiq we've sailed through this too :) All set for mission graduation and mission 2012 ;)

So hang tight everybody, all orders are still processing and reprocessing TIL all glitches are fixed and you receive exactly what you with for. And a request, if you place an order, and by sheer luck, it gets ready in time, please don't disappear on it. That's one reason why I am not taking new orders til old ones are sorted and collected.

In the recent weeks I've had so many Firefly fans disappear on things they've ordered. All I need is an email out of courtesy mentioning please save my order, I shall collect it soon. I am discarding several of them this week. I also implemented the new payment policy because of this.

Once again, apologies to those who've had the bad luck of having their orders delayed or reprocessed more than once. And a big thank you,seriously, my sincere gratitude to every one who has been super super supportive and patient. At the end of the day, nothing makes me smile more than having to know, Firefly brought a smile to someone's face.

Firefly is going to keep glowing inshaALLAH, and will not be curbing into any of the negativity. :) Remember, the forecast is whimsical with a chance of rainbows!

Much love to everyone. Smile Sunshine!
Stay tuned. Lots of magic in store for the coming month inshaAllah!

Dear Allah Mian,

I need my miracle this week. Please?